There are so many negative influences out there in the world today. Just look at the popular music and tv shows. Most of them are plain disgusting. It seems like these disgusting things seek out our youth. How is it possible to raise a child in the world, but keep the world from corrupting them?
What a question Jack! If I just knew how myself then it would be wonderful. As I read in the Book of Mormon about the struggle that King Mosiah and Alma the High Priest had with their children being among those that were unbelievers, and knowing that without the intervention of an angel that could shake the earth with his voice, thus convincing these boys that they were on the wrong path, the outcome in their life would have been vastly different. It almost makes me wish that I could borrow that angel myself. I often ask myself what worked for me? Why did I want to follow my religion? Why did I believe when others did not? Now with children I realize that to a great degree I am just raising myself over and over again. I could mandate no television, but know how I have would have reacted when I was young. I could deny the dance, the social, the swim, the hockey as many have done, and I know what the reaction would have been. I could have family home evening every night, read from the Bible until I was the only one enjoying it, shut off all music other than hymns, and require my children to listen to long monotone sermons night and day. When I was growing up that would have been punishment to me. So, what can I do that will help my children get a foundation in my faith? Or value religion at all?
Some of the most confused people that I have ever met were religious people. They have read everthing that anyone has ever said about anything until they don’t know whether they are coming or going. They don’t know their religious colors or the abc’s because they have a masters degree in confusion. All they seem to know is to follow the leaders. If the leaders say that the unwilling children must go, then out they go. They just give them the boot! We just have to do something different than that. But what? How?
I have a boy that can hardly wait until he is eighteen so that he can try puffing the weed. I have tried to get him to have some other holy aspirations because I have definitely met those who thought that weed was a sacred thing. I have others who only think of making money. Millions of dollars! It doesn’t matter how many times I quote the Savior, “no man can serve God and mammon”, they just know that they want millions of dollars. They want to give it a try. I also know families that to look at them you would gasp in amazement at the visible success that they are having with their family. They are wonderfully dressed, well mannered, and publicly perfect. They haven’t been trained to be that way, they have been broke that way and some of them can hardly wait till their dad dies so that they can have a life. Others just carry on the tradition cause it is not about religion, it is about a tradition that is altogether something other than Christian.
Years ago when I was a young man trying to make any sense at all about our way of life, we had a conference. Our then President Johnson, Uncle Roy as we called him, was speaking in conference talking about the responsibility that parents had to teach their children. An old lady in the assembly raised her hand and stood up. She asked; “Uncle Roy, when does a parent cease being responsible for the actions of their children”? Uncle Roy told her and all of us that a parent ceases being responsible for the actions of their children when they have taught them what God expects of them sufficiently that they know what is right and what is wrong, thus transferring the responsibility to make good choices and decisions to their children. That was the jist of it anyway. I have often reflected on it and reminded myself that I need to contnue teaching my children about the simple decent teachings of Christ. I want them to make good life choices and have them not be able to say, “my father never taught me about that”.
So, here is a bit of advice from a busy dad. Remember that you are trying to raise yourself, your dad, grandfather and great grandfather all in one. You are struggling with your grandmother and great grandmother, your mother in law and maternal grandparents. Not only do your children resemble the photos that you have of them, they have a genetic resemblance in human traits. Yikes, you may think, my grandfather was a pirate! No, you are not trying to raise pirates, just people. Your family is a labor of love, your labor of love, and unique because of the diversity that you have. I have not seen that anyone has done any better with their family than anyone else, but that should be no comfort. Lets teach our kids to keep the commandments of God, how to make good choices when they are old enough, and then honor their choices the best way we can. That doesn’t mean that you can’t kindly nudge them to do better if they have made mistakes, it only means that as their dad, you should.